Just for the sake of staying warm

And in the end
this America?
This place with borders that transcend your map, with policies that clap down on other places lands & faces. It's all for naught. It was all in your head & one day you woke up. You just woke up tucked in the bed spread, turned out the lamps, took your morning piss & said "To hell with it, let's have some fun."

And you turned on the music, the diplomacy in the news was too loud anyway.
And you spent money you never had because baby this is liberty and liberty means that nothing came by you and your real estate if it wasn't fast convenient and in high quantities. Any time some one asked what you thought you just smiled, shoveled more filth in your mouth because your grin said you could take it. It said you could take it and you would like it. and when they asked again, asked you what you thought you said you couldn't stop to answer you had too much to do. because you could never tell them the truth, that the thinking kept you awake at night, it made your head hurt, and most importantly you couldn't tell them the scariest part of the truth.

you didn't know if you liked that it made your head hurt. But that kept you up at night so you said let's have some fun.

and the thoughts came back so you moved away to somewhere with cheaper drinks and colder air. and the thoughts came back so you held on tight to that firm young body and begged for that fuck. that one fuck that would take away your head, that would end your life and take you off the wheel. There wouldn't be a life or a thought or a hurt head after because you could string yourself out for days and then that america you sang and pledged to and shot your fireworks and guns and superiority off for would still be there. Those other boys and girls and countries and jobs and blankets would all wait and maybe. and maybe some of them would be there whenever you got back. but you didn't have time for that right now. Now it was time to have some fun.