Just for the sake of staying warm

And in the end
this America?
This place with borders that transcend your map, with policies that clap down on other places lands & faces. It's all for naught. It was all in your head & one day you woke up. You just woke up tucked in the bed spread, turned out the lamps, took your morning piss & said "To hell with it, let's have some fun."

And you turned on the music, the diplomacy in the news was too loud anyway.
And you spent money you never had because baby this is liberty and liberty means that nothing came by you and your real estate if it wasn't fast convenient and in high quantities. Any time some one asked what you thought you just smiled, shoveled more filth in your mouth because your grin said you could take it. It said you could take it and you would like it. and when they asked again, asked you what you thought you said you couldn't stop to answer you had too much to do. because you could never tell them the truth, that the thinking kept you awake at night, it made your head hurt, and most importantly you couldn't tell them the scariest part of the truth.

you didn't know if you liked that it made your head hurt. But that kept you up at night so you said let's have some fun.

and the thoughts came back so you moved away to somewhere with cheaper drinks and colder air. and the thoughts came back so you held on tight to that firm young body and begged for that fuck. that one fuck that would take away your head, that would end your life and take you off the wheel. There wouldn't be a life or a thought or a hurt head after because you could string yourself out for days and then that america you sang and pledged to and shot your fireworks and guns and superiority off for would still be there. Those other boys and girls and countries and jobs and blankets would all wait and maybe. and maybe some of them would be there whenever you got back. but you didn't have time for that right now. Now it was time to have some fun.

Yo! Check out this write[ing]! /pun

Current weight: 205 lbs.

Ahoy; are you curious about that first line of text? I've gotten in the habit of typing my current weight into my journal entries so that I can evaluate whether I'm loosing or gaining weight in the last four or five weeks. My goal is to hit 200lbs. & then hopefully 185lbs. Currently I'm being a bit lazy about the whole method; I could simply cut out coke's with Stacy [easy] & chocolate milk [incredibly hard] but am doing neither. You reap what you sow, yeah?

This last weekend I celebrated Halloween. You might notice it was the first weekend of November- but I was never a traditionalist so you'll have to bear with me. The Lady & I went to Waco [sans BMatt] to play a murder mystery with our good friends Josh, Angie, Julie, Russel, Megan, & Kevin. It was a Mardi Gras in New Orleans theme [post-hurricane setting? Would have made it a good metaphor involving the depravity of our inner self while we uphold the exterior, alas it was a poorly written game] Stacy was the live-in French Maid & I was a bastard relative born to a stripper. Overall I think my character was a Red Herring to the true murderer [I didn't do it!] since I did come to the party to murder the, ah, the murdered; however someone got to them first. In the end I was the only one who figured out the real murderer [Josh, the best friend & family lawyer] so takes one to know one I guess. Other than the murder mystery, Kevin got Rock Band 2 so we played that for a bit [The Lady quite enjoyed it] & I beat Super Mario Land 2: Six Golden Coins for the original Game Boy, seven-year-old-me would have been very impressed.

Part of going down to Waco was to also get my lip pierced at the tattoo parlor but there was some communication shenanigans with the job so I didn't want to come back with that on my face just yet, one day though. Speaking of work it has been awesome lately. Granted, there are some parts I'm not too fond of [the length of a certain packet I need to fill out occasionally specifically] but I like what all I'm learning. Hopefully by this time next year I'll be a shift-manager but who knows?

I have a question now: Does anyone who plays D&D or have basic skill in HTML editing, or any sort of wiki editing that Obsidian Portal uses? The 'Portal is a website that is parts journal/cast bios/atlus/wiki/etc. It's really neat & I love the idea of it, but problem is that I can't seem to edit it very well. I thought it would be similar to my guild's wiki page, but I guess not. To be fair, I thought this website would be similar to editing my guild's wiki page, but that was also not the case. Please crush me with your information about this; searching for the answer on my own has been slow. fin